This is the before.
Can’t believe I missed another day of blogging. Yesterday was such a weird day. I woke up really early, made my awesome delicious oatmeal and went to the doctor.
Well, I have good news! Kinda. I brought all the exams I had done to the gynecologist and she said that everything’s ok! I’m healthy and even my thyroid and hormones are normal. So apparently, the not-having-my-period-for-months thing is simply because… my body’s a little freaked out!
That’s right. The fact that I didn’t really exercise before and that I’ve lost a lot of weight has caused my body to freak out a little.. but everything’s ok. I’m healthy and so relieved. 🙂
I was supposed to go to the gym, I even had my gym bag with me but I got out of the doctor pretty late and I was so close to my mother’s work that I stopped by to tell her the good news. She asked me if I wanted to wait a bit so we could have lunch together. Of course I did. The food kinda sucked but just spending some time with my mom was worth it. 🙂
The rest of the day was spent running errands and working.
Today for breakfast I made oatmeal again (I’m obsessed!).
I went to the gym, came home and started looking for some photos I had on my external hard drive (one of them…).
I came across some old photos of mine and since I’d told you I was going to do a before and after post I started looking for more. So this is it.
September 2007 (Forget the fact that they’re crappy photos).
I was SO surprised when I saw these. It’s like… Who is that person? This was around the time I started my weight loss journey. I was miserable. Miserable. I felt horrible in my own skin.
A month later, I’d already dropped some pounds. And look, I STILL HAD BOOBS.
These were taken in the school’s photo studio. Filipa and I were working on a project but, of course, we had some fun and took photos of each other too.
I look at these photos and I just remember how insecure this person was. It makes me really sad that I’ve felt like that and I really do not wish it on anybody.
Don’t get me wrong, that Diana knew how to have fun…
and she smiled…
but she was not happy with herself.
Fast forward to November, 2008.
And October 28th, 2009.
This is the only full body photo I have right now, it’ll have to do. (I’m totally thinking about having a photoshoot soon. Yes?)
You see, two years. Was this a long journey or what? And I’m still improving everyday. For me, honestly, now it isn’t so much about weight loss. I am at a healthy weight (59kg) for my height (1,64m). I just want to be fit now. I’ve been going to the gym for two months and let me tell you… I haven’t lost a whole lot of weight but I’ve already dropped a pant size. This is pretty amazing, I think. 🙂 I also feel stronger and I HAVE MUSCLES. I lift weights and every week I challenge myself with heavier ones. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a lot of progress to make… but who doesn’t? Slowly but surely… I will get there. And I’ll keep challenging myself, even after that.
I’m always saying that I still feel like that fat girl and it’s weird not being overweight anymore. Well, after analyzing these photos I came to this conclusion… eff that. Seriously. All of that nonsense.
I’ve worked for this, I’ve worked VERY HARD for this. I’m not like that anymore. I don’t feel like I felt then, I’m comfortable… And I know why I felt weird. Because I’ve always loathed myself. I really did. So I was not used to not hating myself. But I don’t, now. Because I fought for this, and let me tell you… it was worth it.
If you feel like I did then… please don’t stop trying.